I quit having milk products (mainly coffee and tea). Don’t ask me why. I just did. That I find letting go off curd (yoghurt?) to be extremely difficult is another story altogether. Now, whenever I go to someone’s house you must see the way they react. And in India, the degree of hospitality that I show to my guests is directly proportional to the amount of food I successfully stuff them with. It so happens that coffee and tea are common beverages to go with the “hospitality”. Nobody leaves without having either of the above.
(Yes, it’s as if you are almost at gunpoint!
You will take coffee or tea?
No nothing thanks. I am fine.
Ok. So coffee is it?
No seriously. I am fine. Thanks.
How many spoons sugar?
Aaargh! Even salt must be okay with me!)
Recently I went to someone’s house and added them to the list of the jaw-droppers-after-hearing-my-giving-up-milk-products. As soon as I told them that I don’t have coffee or tea their jaw dropped and their eyes widened with a how come you are alive? kind of a look. I give them that sheepish smile as if they had caught me while I just murdered somebody and was looking around to hide the weapon!
What’s so wrong in giving up milk products? I get to have good fresh fruit juices instead. That helps me in controlling my size so that I can still manage to squeeze into doors made for the size of average Indians.
That brings me to the burning issue of my increasing waistline. It’s burning because everyone thinks I am getting more cumbersome by the day. A recent conversation with my tata went this way.
My tata: “Exercise madta idya?” “Are you exercising?”
Me: “Madbeku. Maditini” “I need to. I will”
Me to Me: Oh no not again! This conversation happens everytime I meet him! And I still make those promises like Gen. Musharraf makes on fighting terrorism.
MT: “Madbekappa exercise. Illa andre nodu ee naduve heart problems barta ide chikka chikka avarige. Aa Mr. X gottallva ninge? Avanige 35 kooda aagilla vayyasu, aagle heart attack anthe. Doctors helidru avanige avana weight inda ne avanige aagirodhu antha. So neenu nodko”
“You must exercise. Otherwise, nowadays young people are being affected by heart problems. You know that Mr. X? He was hardly 35 years of age and has had an heart attack already. Doctors told him to reduce weight. You should also take care”
Me: “Hun Tata. Madtini” “Yes Grandfather. Will do”
Me to Me: Atleast this time bugger start doing something once you are in chennai. Don’t keep promising like this to him.
MT: “Nanu S ge yavaglu heltane irtini. Avanu enu madalla. Nodu ivaga henge iddane antha!” “I always used to tell S to exercise and control his weight. He never did anything. Look at him now!”
Me: “Hun tata. Madtini” “Yes Grandfather. Will do”
Me to Me: Okay. From tomorrow I should start exercising. I will get up at 6AM and do some jogging and stretching for atleast 40 minutes.
They are all not entirely wrong you know. They include my mother and every well-wisher of mine. My body today resembles someone like Bomman Irani. Ok to be more precise, the top portion (waist and above, don’t get ideas!) resembles Bomman Irani’s top portion and the legs portion resembles Rambha (I mean that thin! you know!)
Next day morning 6AM. My mobile alarm is almost ready to stand up and crush me to death. No wonder my mobile looks like Amrish Puri to me! Till 6.45AM I am successfully snoozing the alarm when my wife gets up and starts her booting up process to go to office. After she gets up you need no alarm. You are so alarmed at the sounds she can produce once she is awake, you are automatically awake and up on your feet.
One joke to end the random post:
One particular day at office, my colleagues were having tears in their eyes and the sounds in the office were not particularly sad. So, I was looking around as to what was happening. Then one of them managed to explain the joke to me. Somebody had written physiotherapeutist as physio-the-rapist. I was like, “duh?!”. I had to laugh.
Ha ha, I can relate to it totally, though I am in shape. (Round is a shape, you know :D!!! )
But, do exercise, cos we don’t get to move our a** enough as it is, given our sedentary software lifestyle.
And the spelling was allright – physiotherapist. The joke is in placing the hyphen. Or space, if you please.
oops sry the previous comment was for this post! :D lol
If only I could wake up early every day, without any motivation… I would have been so much slimmer.
I know I still lag behind you by a quarter of a quintal, but you will never know when I will be there!
Last year I atleast successfully ran the celebration run (7km) of Bangalore Marathon but this year I did not even dare face that way. I know I must do something but too lazy for it. All of us are on the same note here aren’t we?
Viky:
Yeah yeah, round is a shape and the globe is round for all practical purposes! ;)
Arjuna:
This is what happens when stomach takes over the brain! ;)
Shastri:
My achievement for today: 25 minutes exercise from 6.45AM to 7.10AM! ;)
I know you have to board a bus at 7.00AM. And all ur problems are well documented with me!
May you run more marathons and become Kipteker. All the best! :)
Sam, KP and I have signed an imaginary online MoU to pep each other up to do something about losing weight. Membership is open. No entry fee. Only one condition, pep up each other to do more exercise or anything else that’s constructive and low-cost and lose weight.
Good Luck to you. It is never to late to start living healthier, and one can never be too healthy.
Two things –
1. Drink more water: Keep a bottle with you always, and walk and refill it every now and then. The washroom on my office floor has four stalls, and in my eight working hours, I make it a point to contribute to each one of them.
2. Take the stairs: On your way up, and on your way down. I take them six times a day – two for entry and exit, twice for lunch, twice for snacks.
A brisk walk every alternate day, and some badminton on weekends will prevent the paunch. For shapely arms and suchlike, go join a gym.
Lisa:
Thanks! :)
Anonymous:
Thanks for the advice! Will implement them and give you feedback if you can identify yourself.
On the lighter side, why do you sound like my mother?! :)
LOL!!! Rambha thighs is a good reference to make me understand how you look like..
How about Yoga?? Try it out yaar ,I heard it works out..
Sudhakar:
Yoga is fine. In fact, I had started it sometime back and left it midway like every other activity that I take up! :(
Need to restart!
he he he. I need to exercise too but that’s so boring!
I love milk. That is one think, I can’t give up. :)
Hardu:
Okay, let me make it interesting. Put on music and start doing your exercise. It ll be real fun I tell you.
You ll not have to give up milk unless you reach my position of half-bomman irani and half-rambha! LOL! ;)
y the hell u refer the coffee and tea as milk products. they r not milk products. its very misleading to read that u wanna avoid milk products for good reasons !!!!.
Ravi:
Thanks for your comment! First time here na, welcome!
If coffee and tea are not milk products, then what are they? Do let me know.
Let me just clarify at this juncture that by milk products I meant those things that have more than 75% milk in them. Which I guess is a very sane definition